The Light in 2013: A Year in Review

As the cycle of the year nears its end and the prospect of new life, new opportunities, and new adventures lay ahead, I find myself – like so many others – reminiscing and reflecting on the past year. The triumphs, the failures, the happy milestones and the sad ones, and all the in-between moments that somehow resurface when we realize how quickly time has escaped us.

This year has been one for the record books – well, at least my proverbial record book. Much has transpired in my life, my family’s life, and my friends’ lives. And if I zoom out of my own little world, there is an even larger net of people and communities, countries and cultures that have been affected in various ways this year. From political upheavals to global mass tragedies to war and death and tyranny, much of the year (and all too often every year) we have experienced a lot of dark turmoil.  However, without darkness, there cannot be an appreciation for light. And amidst the tragedies and the uncertainty of a changing and adapting world, there came forth a brilliant light in the form of people and communities banding together, helping one another, and encouraging the light to shine through all those dark moments. Ultimately, it is through the reflection of the good and the bad, the happy and sad that we decide how we'll value these last 365 days and how we will cherish them as we embark on a new cycle of life.

For me personally, I choose to value this year as an amazing journey of achievements, renewal, and love.  And my cherished memories for 2013 are solidified in those three elements.

Achievements

My journey of education -- of knowledge and enlightenment of passion and dedication -- was realized this year as I completed my Master's degree in English. After many, many years of struggling to figure out my educational path, I finally managed to get on the right one and made my way through the thicket and bracken that had suffocated my passions. It was a scary endeavor and one that was filled with moments of trepidation and weariness, but in the end, all of that darkness made way for the light of achievement and the beautiful feeling of success. Of all that I've accomplished in previous years, this is the one honor that will be a beacon for all others -- a reminder that all is not lost as long as you have a small glimmer of hope still glowing inside.

Renewal

And with achievement also came renewal. In the form of renewed creativity, inspiration, and dedication. I found my voice again and my desire to share it with others. A much anticipated vacation to the land of art and beauty and awakening stimulated my senses and ushered into my life a baptism of thoughts and ideas. Paris and London were my antidote to my mundane existence. The milieu of these decadent places enriched my soul with an artistic ambition, allowing me to return to my desert home with buoyancy in my imagination and eagerness to express it. And that is exactly what I did. I began writing poetry again, discovering music again, examining and thinking about art again -- all essential activities of renewal. And in those exploratory acts, I not only found myself again, but a slightly better version of myself that would lead me to discovering the most vital of all.

Love

This ubiquitous feeling all humans possess isn't one that comes entirely natural to me. Love is an intangible, and it comes in many forms. I love my family. I love my friends. I love dogs. I love mustard with my French fries. I love rainy days. I love the novel Catcher in the Rye. The amount and scope of my love seems limitless, but when confronted by this emotion's complexities and its simplicities, I often find myself bewildered and dumbfounded. This bewilderment and dumbfoundedness came to me twice this year. First, when my grandma passed away after a month struggle following a fall and many years of progressive Alzheimer's. Her death was unexpected, although it wasn't entirely a surprise. Nevertheless, the loss of someone who had been in my life for its entirety was a shock to my system -- a realization that love isn't just verbal or symbolic, but that it is a force -- an energy -- deep inside that must be nurtured and allowed to grow. Sadly, it took the death of a loved one to be reminded that although I often see love as an ethereal emotion for me, it is always there, right under the surface, right there in the midst of my life just waiting to be discovered and recovered.

And that is what led me to my second moment of astonishment and bafflement by love. It came in the form of a kind, generous, and handsome man who magically one day appeared like the Ghost of Christmas past -- except it wasn't quite Christmas yet. His reappearance into my life was the 21st century equivalent to the Victorian epistolary novels -- emails back and forth, long and delightful, filled with stories and ideas, thoughts and philosophies, discussions and analyses: something that most men (or women for that matter) have no time or desire to compose. But he did. He made time (and continues to make time) to talk to me about art, poetry, life, and, well, everything. He came to me like a long awaited rain shower -- a memory that was comforting and nurturing -- and that returned to me the exact moment I was about to give up on the hope of it ever reaching me. And it is that nourishment -- that love from this man from my past, whose essence never really left my mind or heart -- that has made everything this year and for years to come that much more beautiful and brilliant.

And with achievements, renewal, and love fresh in the air, may the end of 2013 bring everyone a sense of tranquility and contentment, and the desire for a new year filled with unlimited possibilities and new found hope.

Here's wishing everyone peace, happiness & love for 2014!